Sunday, February 14, 2010

Why is it that every single girl who wears Ugg boots walks exactly the same way?

I found myself walking in a rather deserted part of campus with a girl wearing Uggs right behind me. The only thing I could hear were her footsteps, and every single one of them ground at my brain like a belt sander on my eardrums.

Maybe it's because my mom always taught me never to drag my feet when I walk. Whenever there's snow on the ground, I look back at my footsteps to make sure that my footprints are just of my foot, and not of my foot plus a tail (like that of a comet) behind it. Uggs seem to be the main culprit of this heinous offense. I'm pretty sure that most female Ugg-wearers spend more time with their foot connected to the ground than off of it when they're taking a step. It's the dragging sound that really gets to me.

Writing about it simply doesn't do it justice. You can only understand if you've actually heard it. If you go to BYU, you've certainly heard it. Even though Uggs went out of the main style scene (at least to my knowledge) a long time ago, they seem to be a staple of all of those Belmont dwelling, Mercedes Benz driving, half a pea for dinner eating, $350 jeans wearing, perfume overwhelming, plastic looking girls we're all too familiar with. I'm fairly certain I've never been affiliated with those girls, nor do I see it happening in the future.

Another thing that I've noticed about Uggs is that they make it very apparent that the wearer either walks on the extreme outsides or the insides of her feet. After time, the sides of the boot just start to wear down...well, see for yourself:

Why, world, why?

We must band together, and stop this insanity.


Kayla said...

bahahaha! oh brooklyn, i love this. it's true. most girls that wear uggs have no idea how to properly walk in them. i'm sure i am guilty at one point or another of shuffling my feet, but since buying bearclaw boots that ACTUALLY fit, i'm pretty sure i walk normally. (as can be shown through the boots themselves, which still look as even as the day i got them).
the best are the girls that wear ugg boots with a skirt/shorts/short shorts, etc. but maybe that's really only prevalent in CA--don't they know that they're literally a walking contradiction?? :)

Jeff Shirts said...

THANK YOU FOR THAT! I have hated Uggs for so long! Oh man! Well thanks for that. It was a good break in the studying for finals/midterms. Which all happen in week. But you probably remember that.