[flush]
I wash my hands.
I go to dry my hands off.
I reach for the towel, and watch as it knocks a roll of toilet paper off the top of the toilet and head right for the waiting toilet bowl.**
Do you ever see something happening, but do nothing about it because you know that even though you are watching it happen right before your eyes, your reflexes just aren't fast enough to keep it from happening?
Welcome to my life.
**Note: luckily, roll of toilet paper hits edge of toilet seat just right and lands on floor. Phew.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Wait...what?
It's funny, the misconceptions we have as children.
I've discussed this with a few people lately, and I'd like to share my findings.
This all started when I thought about the things that I always thought were characteristics of every family simply because it was how it was in my family. For example:
-I thought that the Dad was always older than the Mom.
-I thought that while the Dad was older than the Mom, your parents were still the same age.
Why did I think these things? Because that's how my parents are. My Dad is only a few months older than my Mom. When I found out that some people's parents were different ages, and especially when I found out that their Mom was older than their Dad, it really freaked me out. Even to this day, it's hard for me to fathom marrying a man younger than me. The age difference thing has lost its potency to me, but only because I've always dated guys who were older than I am.
I was discussing this with a coworker the other day and he told me about an experience he'd had as a child. Growing up in a Mormon family, it was always understood that you didn't play outside on Sunday. You just didn't do it. Apparently, one Sunday his neighbors were out playing in their yard. And bless his little heart, Michael went outside and reprimanded them, because that's what he had always known.
Along the same vein (vane? not sure which it is), it's always funny to watch movies not made for children (I'd originally put "adult movies" and decided that might not be the best descriptor...) that I watched as a child. I realize now how much I didn't get back then. And strangely, there's some stuff I still don't get just because I didn't get it as a child. The movie Mission: Impossible still baffles me a little bit, because I just didn't really know what was going on when I watched it as a child. There are a lot of movies like that.
I think that's all I have. I'm sitting in the library, putting off the paper I have to write and test I need to study for. I'm sitting in the loudest part of the library, but I'm here because there are comfy chairs. The chairs are worth the prices paid: loud people, and I'm by these huge windows, which means I'm freezing cold. But at least I'm comfortable. That's what's important.
I've discussed this with a few people lately, and I'd like to share my findings.
This all started when I thought about the things that I always thought were characteristics of every family simply because it was how it was in my family. For example:
-I thought that the Dad was always older than the Mom.
-I thought that while the Dad was older than the Mom, your parents were still the same age.
Why did I think these things? Because that's how my parents are. My Dad is only a few months older than my Mom. When I found out that some people's parents were different ages, and especially when I found out that their Mom was older than their Dad, it really freaked me out. Even to this day, it's hard for me to fathom marrying a man younger than me. The age difference thing has lost its potency to me, but only because I've always dated guys who were older than I am.
I was discussing this with a coworker the other day and he told me about an experience he'd had as a child. Growing up in a Mormon family, it was always understood that you didn't play outside on Sunday. You just didn't do it. Apparently, one Sunday his neighbors were out playing in their yard. And bless his little heart, Michael went outside and reprimanded them, because that's what he had always known.
Along the same vein (vane? not sure which it is), it's always funny to watch movies not made for children (I'd originally put "adult movies" and decided that might not be the best descriptor...) that I watched as a child. I realize now how much I didn't get back then. And strangely, there's some stuff I still don't get just because I didn't get it as a child. The movie Mission: Impossible still baffles me a little bit, because I just didn't really know what was going on when I watched it as a child. There are a lot of movies like that.
I think that's all I have. I'm sitting in the library, putting off the paper I have to write and test I need to study for. I'm sitting in the loudest part of the library, but I'm here because there are comfy chairs. The chairs are worth the prices paid: loud people, and I'm by these huge windows, which means I'm freezing cold. But at least I'm comfortable. That's what's important.
Monday, November 16, 2009
On Thanksgiving
I can tell it's about Thanksgiving time.
How?
It's not the Christmas decorations filling every store and building on campus.
It's not the Christmas music played by all my coworkers.
It's not the changing of the seasons from Fall to Winter.
It's not the falling leaves all around, or the frosty mornings, or the occasional snow fall.
It's not the irresistible urge to gorge myself on turkey, potatoes, gravy, stuffing, cranberries, corn, and pumpkin pie.
It's not the cornucopia of activities available for me to do (that was a play on words: double meaning right there).
It's not the ending of the Football season, nor the start of Basketball season.
It's the fact that I can't seem to bring myself to do any homework at all.
How?
It's not the Christmas decorations filling every store and building on campus.
It's not the Christmas music played by all my coworkers.
It's not the changing of the seasons from Fall to Winter.
It's not the falling leaves all around, or the frosty mornings, or the occasional snow fall.
It's not the irresistible urge to gorge myself on turkey, potatoes, gravy, stuffing, cranberries, corn, and pumpkin pie.
It's not the cornucopia of activities available for me to do (that was a play on words: double meaning right there).
It's not the ending of the Football season, nor the start of Basketball season.
It's the fact that I can't seem to bring myself to do any homework at all.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
The BFG
Whenever I walk on campus, I see people who are shorter than me. Being nearly 6 feet tall, this isn't hard for me. However, sometimes I'll see those girls (usually) who are practically 5 foot nothing, and whenever I do, I always think,
"Man, that girl is so small!!"
Then today I realized: I wonder if when those girls see me, they think,
"Man, that girl is gigantic!!"
I wouldn't be offended if they did--it's true.
"Man, that girl is so small!!"
Then today I realized: I wonder if when those girls see me, they think,
"Man, that girl is gigantic!!"
I wouldn't be offended if they did--it's true.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Touch me!
I think I have a curse.
Something about me attracts couples. That alone could be bad enough, but these are always couples who just can't seem to keep their hands off of each other. I really am a bit baffled as to why and how these people seem to find their way to me.
For example, on Halloween I went to a friend's party. There were not very many couples there--maybe one or two. At least one. How do I know? There were probably 50 party-goers crammed in a living room about 15 feet by 10 feet, if that. Because there were so many of us in such a small room, pretty much everyone was touching a different person on all sides, which meant none of us could really move much. For some reason, I managed to end up having an entire half of my body being taken up by this couple determined to essentially grind on each other...and in turn, on me. So, as was natural, I moved. Don't worry, they found their way back to me! This happened probably a good 3 or 4 times.
Maybe I just naturally ooze pheromones that only affect those already in a relationship? Perhaps this pheromone of mine heightens the high of their already raging hormones. It remains a mystery.
Either way, as I said the other night, I just make people want to touch each other. I didn't ask for it. But I'm trying to find a way to make it work to my advantage...if you think of anything, let me know.
Something about me attracts couples. That alone could be bad enough, but these are always couples who just can't seem to keep their hands off of each other. I really am a bit baffled as to why and how these people seem to find their way to me.
For example, on Halloween I went to a friend's party. There were not very many couples there--maybe one or two. At least one. How do I know? There were probably 50 party-goers crammed in a living room about 15 feet by 10 feet, if that. Because there were so many of us in such a small room, pretty much everyone was touching a different person on all sides, which meant none of us could really move much. For some reason, I managed to end up having an entire half of my body being taken up by this couple determined to essentially grind on each other...and in turn, on me. So, as was natural, I moved. Don't worry, they found their way back to me! This happened probably a good 3 or 4 times.
Maybe I just naturally ooze pheromones that only affect those already in a relationship? Perhaps this pheromone of mine heightens the high of their already raging hormones. It remains a mystery.
Either way, as I said the other night, I just make people want to touch each other. I didn't ask for it. But I'm trying to find a way to make it work to my advantage...if you think of anything, let me know.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Time wasting.
We all do it. Maybe I'm just prejudiced to the ways in which I do it. Most of my time-wasting is spent listening to music, Facebooking, playing Nonograms, or generally just not thinking about what I'm supposed to be doing (usually homework). Currently, I'm blog writing to waste time.
Maybe I just don't like being part of fads. I only ever read Twilight because I was on a camping trip and hadn't brought anything to read with me, and someone had it with them. But something in me just refuses to do everything everyone else is doing (Harry Potter excluded), even if it's entertaining. For example, there's a website called "My Life is Average." These kinds of websites have been springing up all over the Interweb, where there is a common theme (F My Life has people who have crappy things happen to them, Makes Me Think has people who have inspirational or ironic things happen to them, etc.), they're all set up to look exactly the same, only with a different color scheme. For some reason, these sites have become very popular, especially among high school and college students.
And I just can't bring myself to read them, at least not consistently. I read FML for a little while. I read a few MMT's, and I'd spent a fair amount of time on MLIA. But, while they may be slightly entertaining, I have no desire to use them to waste my time. Perhaps it's the idea that some people can and do waste SO much time on these sites that makes me not want to.
Am I a time-wasting snob? Should I be worried about my prejudices toward these things?
I don't think so. I have enough with my current time-wasting habits, like blog writing, to worry about the *potential* time wasters. At least you get something out of it. :)
Maybe I just don't like being part of fads. I only ever read Twilight because I was on a camping trip and hadn't brought anything to read with me, and someone had it with them. But something in me just refuses to do everything everyone else is doing (Harry Potter excluded), even if it's entertaining. For example, there's a website called "My Life is Average." These kinds of websites have been springing up all over the Interweb, where there is a common theme (F My Life has people who have crappy things happen to them, Makes Me Think has people who have inspirational or ironic things happen to them, etc.), they're all set up to look exactly the same, only with a different color scheme. For some reason, these sites have become very popular, especially among high school and college students.
And I just can't bring myself to read them, at least not consistently. I read FML for a little while. I read a few MMT's, and I'd spent a fair amount of time on MLIA. But, while they may be slightly entertaining, I have no desire to use them to waste my time. Perhaps it's the idea that some people can and do waste SO much time on these sites that makes me not want to.
Am I a time-wasting snob? Should I be worried about my prejudices toward these things?
I don't think so. I have enough with my current time-wasting habits, like blog writing, to worry about the *potential* time wasters. At least you get something out of it. :)
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Stupid things parents do that actually work
I realized today how many stupid things parents tell their children to do. I'm not talking like, "Hey little Jimmy, see how fast you can run at that wall" kind of stupid thing, but things to make their kids feel better, or be entertained, etc. These are a few examples from my life:
Child: "My (insert body part) hurts."
Parent: "Count to 100."
This never did anything to make me feel better, but by the time I finished, it usually didn't hurt anymore, or at least as much.
Parent: "(Name of child), go get me (insert needed object). See how fast you can go; I'll time you!"
Child goes to get object, usually rather quickly in order to "make good time."
However, this soon turns into,
Child: "Mom, I'm gonna get (object). Time me and see how fast I go!"
Downside: parents never actually time their child. But at least the kid thinks he or she is super fast.
This one's a little more situational. I remember when my brother got the Chicken Pox. He had one particularly itchy spot on the top of his head, and my mother tried many things to keep him from scratching. In the end, she gave him his teddy bear and told him to scratch the bear where he itched (on the top of his head). I don't know why this worked, but I'm assuming that it did. How do I know this? Because when I got the Chicken Pox, my mom did the same thing to me, and I remember not feeling so itchy.
These are just a few examples of experiences I'm sure we all had as children, without which, our childhoods would have been bleak and painful.
Child: "My (insert body part) hurts."
Parent: "Count to 100."
This never did anything to make me feel better, but by the time I finished, it usually didn't hurt anymore, or at least as much.
Parent: "(Name of child), go get me (insert needed object). See how fast you can go; I'll time you!"
Child goes to get object, usually rather quickly in order to "make good time."
However, this soon turns into,
Child: "Mom, I'm gonna get (object). Time me and see how fast I go!"
Downside: parents never actually time their child. But at least the kid thinks he or she is super fast.
This one's a little more situational. I remember when my brother got the Chicken Pox. He had one particularly itchy spot on the top of his head, and my mother tried many things to keep him from scratching. In the end, she gave him his teddy bear and told him to scratch the bear where he itched (on the top of his head). I don't know why this worked, but I'm assuming that it did. How do I know this? Because when I got the Chicken Pox, my mom did the same thing to me, and I remember not feeling so itchy.
These are just a few examples of experiences I'm sure we all had as children, without which, our childhoods would have been bleak and painful.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
I like to...
I attended a "home ward" today, and I realized something during the testimony meeting.
For 99% of children who get up and bear their testimony, each will say the exact same 6 words to start off the testimony.
When I was little though, I always thought we were supposed to say
"I like to bear my testimony."
Not
"I'd like to bear my testimony."
I don't know when it was that I realized that you were supposed to say the second instead of the first, but was I the only child who had this misconception?
For 99% of children who get up and bear their testimony, each will say the exact same 6 words to start off the testimony.
When I was little though, I always thought we were supposed to say
"I like to bear my testimony."
Not
"I'd like to bear my testimony."
I don't know when it was that I realized that you were supposed to say the second instead of the first, but was I the only child who had this misconception?
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
My Confession
Alright, I'll admit it:
I have an addiction...
to music.
Just about every night, I get ready for bed about midnight. However, I don't usually get to bed til about 1. Why? I'll be listening to music, and I'll just want to hear one more song. Then another. Then another. I just can't stop. And the next thing I know, I've blown an hour playing solitaire whilst singing along to my favorite songs.
Besides the sleep I lose, though, I'm not so sure that this addiction is such a bad thing.
I have an addiction...
to music.
Just about every night, I get ready for bed about midnight. However, I don't usually get to bed til about 1. Why? I'll be listening to music, and I'll just want to hear one more song. Then another. Then another. I just can't stop. And the next thing I know, I've blown an hour playing solitaire whilst singing along to my favorite songs.
Besides the sleep I lose, though, I'm not so sure that this addiction is such a bad thing.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Through your eyes
Do you ever wonder what you look like to other people?
I mean, sure I've looked at myself in the mirror a few times. I know what I look like when I'm looking at me.
But what about when I'm not looking? I think if I ever had an out-of-body experience and saw myself walking down the street, I might not recognize me. I don't know what my mannerisms are: how I walk, how I speak, the way I move my hands when I talk, etc. Well, kind of, but only how they look and sound while I'm me.
When I was little I always used to wish that I could spend a day in someone else's body. I don't know why, but I always imagined spending a day in the life of my sister, Jenni. I don't know what it was that made me pick her, but I always wished that I could see me through her eyes. But this switching bodies wish wasn't just so I could see what I looked like. In fact, that was a very small part of it. I suppose I'm just (and always have been) very curious as to how everyone else sees the world. I want to know how other people perceive things. I want to know how situations that affect me one way affect them. If you know me, you know I'm very unique. Does the way I would interpret a situation completely differ from the way another person would? How much would it differ?
Also, I want to know how other people see. Stephen always used to say I was so weird because my pupils are always unnaturally large. I'm pretty sure that my pupils are almost always nearly twice the size of just about anyone else's pupils (anyone else being anyone who is in the same situation and lighting as me). I've never thought it was a problem. I still don't. Stephen has a theory that I can't see color as well as everyone else. I disagree, but I'll never know if I do or if I don't, because I'll never be able to see through someone else's eyes.
This isn't to say that I'm not happy being me. I love being me. But, being me, I'm very curious about...pretty much everything. And this just happens to be one of those things.
Perhaps one day when I get to create my own worlds (keep your fingers crossed), I'll allow people to do that. You can switch bodies with someone for one day, just to see what it's like. I think that would be pretty cool.
I mean, sure I've looked at myself in the mirror a few times. I know what I look like when I'm looking at me.
But what about when I'm not looking? I think if I ever had an out-of-body experience and saw myself walking down the street, I might not recognize me. I don't know what my mannerisms are: how I walk, how I speak, the way I move my hands when I talk, etc. Well, kind of, but only how they look and sound while I'm me.
When I was little I always used to wish that I could spend a day in someone else's body. I don't know why, but I always imagined spending a day in the life of my sister, Jenni. I don't know what it was that made me pick her, but I always wished that I could see me through her eyes. But this switching bodies wish wasn't just so I could see what I looked like. In fact, that was a very small part of it. I suppose I'm just (and always have been) very curious as to how everyone else sees the world. I want to know how other people perceive things. I want to know how situations that affect me one way affect them. If you know me, you know I'm very unique. Does the way I would interpret a situation completely differ from the way another person would? How much would it differ?
Also, I want to know how other people see. Stephen always used to say I was so weird because my pupils are always unnaturally large. I'm pretty sure that my pupils are almost always nearly twice the size of just about anyone else's pupils (anyone else being anyone who is in the same situation and lighting as me). I've never thought it was a problem. I still don't. Stephen has a theory that I can't see color as well as everyone else. I disagree, but I'll never know if I do or if I don't, because I'll never be able to see through someone else's eyes.
This isn't to say that I'm not happy being me. I love being me. But, being me, I'm very curious about...pretty much everything. And this just happens to be one of those things.
Perhaps one day when I get to create my own worlds (keep your fingers crossed), I'll allow people to do that. You can switch bodies with someone for one day, just to see what it's like. I think that would be pretty cool.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)